NSFW: What happens in Vegas

A few years ago, A-Dubs and I went to Vegas with our entourage. And this is what we wore:

None of us were getting married. None of us bought drinks all night.
This is me, Rinty the Crusher and KellyBean, being awesome on the casino floor.
This is what A-Dubs wore, which I think was a nightgown. She was the slutty bride. Slutty enough to get a creepy guy to buy us one rose wrapped in cellophane.
Not slutty enough to get the whole dozen.
This is what I wore. My mother noted that I look “as big as a house” in this dress. It was $6 at the Sally Ann, but I got it for 50% off. It’s hard to see here but there’s a big bow at my navel, which is mostly why I bought it.
I would have worn this if I were getting married in Vegas; I don’t care that I look double-wide.
Dress: Salvation Army bargain
Shoes: Topshop
Beads: from KellyBean
Faux Outdoors: The Bellagio


Do you and your entourage ever dress alike? In Vegas?
Isn’t it awesome when clothes make fun times funner?

46 thoughts on “NSFW: What happens in Vegas

  1. I've never been to Vegas, but if I were to go this would be the way I'd want to do it.Moms are strange about bodies, aren't they? Like to give you a complex.

  2. Woo – 'cannot wait for the photo-documentation from all others! (Even though no one's agreed to follow your directive, D-Med, I feel certain that they should as it's the appropriate and feminist thing to do.)Also, E-Jooooooooo! And finally, perhaps now's the time to begin organizing a fantasy style-blogger Vegas conference? We could plan it for, like, 18 months from now. And for those who are politically opposed to Vegas excess (which I'm assuming we all kind of are), we need to think of it as an important scholarly opportunity to inhabit the most overt version of the simulacrum/society of the spectacle!

  3. That's so awesome! I should wrangle my Winesday Women into something like this. Fab idea. My mom always went on how she was "so fat" when she got married…and then I wore her wedding dress when I got married, and it was so freakin' tight!! Enough to give me a complex.

  4. KB, you will never do that to your daughter. We won't let you.Also, I just need to add this detail. My mother ran into my ex's well-endowed new girlfriend/roomie at the BUTCHER SHOP. Where I never go. Obviously. Seriously, the devil is in the details.

  5. My friend, a future librarian extraordinaire, just sent me the link to your blog. I'm in HEAVEN! Not only do I love your fashion stylin' mad skillz but I love that I now know where I can wear my wedding dress again. It's been 13 years. I've been dying to wear it again.Should I just bust it out for the hell of it anyway?

  6. There's more than enough room on our virtual beer-swillin' judge's panel! By all means, join us Kelly!I would LOVE to see a karaoke throw down with Rad, A-Dubs and Rad's friend Anthony. No one karaokes like he does. But to be clear – I'm not as big of a fan of karaoke as I am of singing "Edelweiss" (or marching in a parade) with the polka band at my neighborhood Bavarian Haus.

  7. Rad: I think the idea of a real conference was me, reading comments quickly and missing the word virtual. But still, I am all about real, cause I do not see myself heading to Vegas otherwise. (Though I have a standing invitation from someone else's husband to go to Vegas with him. They just had a kid though, so I do not see him dashing off to take me to Vegas anytime soon.)I do want to say that I also love both my mom and my aunt, though I think that their desire to protect (by telling you horrible perceived truths before others can do so) or to project their hopes/dreams/fears/insecurities etc, can be tough. But I think it is tough because they love us and we love them too much to be able to easily write them off, the way that we do others.

  8. Oh lordy, I am way too excited about this LaVegas, real or virtual, get together, complete with country singalongs.Anne will attest that I am more of a class country gal myself. I sang, "You never even call me by my name," (there's a lot of opportunities for audience involvement) this past spring whilst NOT going to conference panels, but in my defense, it was Mardi Gras, in N'Orleans, and I was with Anthony (Anne realizes what this means). Anne's quite good at singing too. She does a mean "Edelweiss". I am going to take a wager and say that D-Med is probably also a top notch singer. We already know that she plays dead better than anyone else. But I imagine that she likes a different genre?Kelly, we'll need you there, in case of a tie breaker.@SU: I wonder how much of the criticisms we receive from our mothers are really a reflection of their own insecurities? I don't really look much like my mother either (we are all odd permutations of my dad, no questions of paternity here). But she had so many hopes and dreams for me, that since early childhood, she projected onto me what she wanted for herself. I love her a lot anyway, but that doesn't always make it easier.

  9. Wow, I go to work and THIS happens!The wedding dress photos had me yelling "OH MY FRICKIN' CRAZY" at the top of my lungs. (Kids are home) Brillant, just brillant.I'm a 3.5 hours drive from Vegas. I will meet you there, anytime. Come back to my house for some surf and sand. I will set up lessons for you.As for mothers, I'm adopted. We have a different relationship. Besides, my mom has no style. She's wonderful etc. but no style. Mine is self taught or hereditary, I think the latter. If she makes remarks on what I wear, I just smile because I KNOW I look fine. Growing up my mom never made comments about my appearance, ever. I guess when you look nothing like your mom, not even the slightest, there is no insecurities to project. I don't know, I think I'm making this up as I'm typing it.Now I have Lili and Keegan and I will take all your complaints, comments, and suggestions. I will now go forth and parent.VEGAS in 2010 or 2011!SU out

  10. @D-Med: thanks for the backup.@Rad: thanks for the vote of confidence! I would love to join Anne in the beer-swilling judges' box, if there's room! Country / rockabilly group ensemble for the next Vegas trip?

  11. Only because you refuse to understand how awesome it is to sing in a dingy bar in front of a drunken group of steeltown strangers. Also, how's this for a piece of lyrical awesomeness:"A stark naked light bulb hangs over my head/ There's one lonely pillow on my double bed/ Yeah, I've got a ceiling, a floor and four walls/ Oh, who says you can't have it all?My room's decorated with pictures of you/ Your letters wallpaper this shrine to the blues/ I've got precious memories at my beck and call/ Oh, who says you can't have it all?" (Alan Jackson – guess the title?)Also, I agree that mothers (and some aunts) say unintentionally enraging things to us as they deal with their own issues. I am more than a little comforted to know that others experience mom-rage.And finally, oh god – D-Med: are you going in the RV? Is it decided, then?

  12. I have a certain fondness for the Dixie Chicks. I developed it in self defense, because of a mom story. Remember when the Dixie Chicks apologized for Bush? And when their sales plummeted? My mom felt bad for them, and so she bought all of their CDs. And they are all that are in her car. And so, when she picks me up at the airport (more than an hour from the house), it is us and the Chicks. (At some point, when I am drunker than Rad, but acting less drunk, ask me about my dad and the Red Hot Chili Peppers.)@Cynthia: Thankfully, it is considered such a tragedy that I am unmarried in my early thirties that we do not speak of it.

  13. A-Dubs also has pretty mad karaoke skillz. Country tunes are her specialty but our friendship has managed to persevere anyway. I would like to see Rad and D-Med in a Dixie Chicks-off, complete with costumes! Anne and I will drink beer and judge.

  14. Rad: Berlin may be a ways off for me, considering how many years it's taken me to get around to planning trips to places like NYC and California. But thank goodness for neighborhood bars filled to the brim with gemuetlichkeit! And I can definitely attest to your mad karaoke skills. You rock it even with a terrible fake mustache on.

  15. I missed out on this somehow. Wow. I have mom stories too.Anne, we will take Manhattan. And then we'll take Berlin (OK, maybe Berlin is more far off, but we both love us some gemuetlichkeit).Atlantic City, Vegas virtual or real conference- all sounds good to me. I don't gamble, I stopped drinking, but I can stay up REAL late and act drunker than you. And I KILL at karaoke. Not with actual skills, mind you, but with unironic enthusiasm. No hipster cred here.OK, DMed, if you do a post explaining your past life as an actress, I will do a post with PICTURES from my past life in the naked army. Also, I also hate camping. As this character in "Six Feet under" once said, "Why do you run around this man and sleep in tents like a refugee?"Cynthia: Gah! Your mom sounds like what my mom used to say about my college boyfriend, who had earning potential but she couldn't stand because he was skinny and had allergies, but the ragged me year later for being unmarried in my mid-late 20s and "letting him get away." Sigh. Also, the treats thing is ridiculous. We really do have to train our parents.A-Dubs, I can't imagine that you are aging ungracefully. You look gorgeous in your pictures. Poop on moms who say hurtful things.@KellyBean: I don't know you that well but if you're friends with these fine ladies, I bet you'll be a truly B.A. mom.@AfTK: Aunts are the best and the worst! My great aunt in Korea once chastised me for showing off like an 1" of my 26 year old belly (whilst stretching) because of my future babies' health, and then yelled at me about everything I was doing (sitting on a cold floor, not having enough weight around my hips) that was killing my unborn babies. Um, thanks? (one of my other aunts is always comparing her daughter to me, in a way that is mean to her daughter- like Why can't you date lots of guys like Rad? Why can't you exercise like Rad? Why can't you study more like Rad?)

  16. Cynthia: That must be so annoying! Why do they do that? Like it'd be better to stay with someone terrible than *gasp* be alone! Why does logic and reason seem to just fly out the window with moms sometimes?D-Med: Nope, that never happens with the sons. My mom has nothing but nice things to say to/about my brother. He's a doctor, which she'll tell you within about 2 minutes of talking to her, regardless of what topic you're actually discussing. Good luck with this weekend – that sounds… not so fun. Could you camp around in your Vegas wedding dress?

  17. OMG don't get me started about my mother and how she now (that I'm 41 and single) looks fondly back and muses about my ex-husband the daily wake-and-baker with serious psychological issues (who she HATED at the time) and wonders aloud…"how could you have avoided screwing up with B and held on to him".

  18. Ack! Mothers! I think Wendy B is right about a lot of the stuff being their own stuff visited on their daughters (curiously not their sons, at least not in my family) and that they really somehow don't realise how truly hurtful they can be, but still … argh! My mother is headed here as we speak and her ETA is Friday. She is arriving with her new(ish) boyfriend/partner in their new RV and I think I am expected to tour around with them (my nightmare. I love not camping; I have a mug from A-Dubs that says so). Seriously, there should be a class for kids when one parent disappears that covers parental dating because it is some kind of weird.

  19. All this mom-venting is actually pretty therapeutic, especially since I just spent 4 days visiting mine. She's gotten a lot better about my weight, especially since I've gotten a lot healthier over the years (and I actually did have a talk with her about how hurtful some of the stuff she said was – she had no idea!).I hate all that ex- business though. I broke up with the most toxic guy ever (this was the impetus for me moving to Chicago), and she called that decision erratic and even talked to the guy behind my back about how he should try to get me back. And all because she didn't want me moving 4 hours away from home.

  20. This is hilarious. I might have to steal your idea some day.Also your mom is probably worried about her own age and projecting onto you. Don't take it personally.

  21. KB, you will never do that to your daughter. We won't let you.Also, I just need to add this detail. My mother ran into my ex's well-endowed new girlfriend/roomie at the BUTCHER SHOP. Where I never go. Obviously. Seriously, the devil is in the details.

  22. That was one of the best nights ever. EVER.D-Med, I am echoing A-Dubs: I like your mom, but she is wrong about you and that dress. You did not look like a house, and you were by far the chicest bride in Vegas that night.A-Dubs, I like your mom, but she is wrong about you and aging. Gah! Why do moms do that? I really really really don't want to do that to my daughter.

  23. Yeah, my aunt likes to tell me when my clothing is too tight. The problem being that she thinks anything fitted is too tight. I know that she is trying to protect me from looking bad, but she does not seem to understand that the 30 year difference in our ages affect what we wear and than she often makes me FEEL bad. My mom is better about this, but has her own weight and body issues, which seem to have been passed right on, through nature or nurture. But no, D-Med, you do not look like a house in that dress….

  24. OMG. More on mothers. This might be another post. Or another blog I don't want to start. My mother used to send me press clippings from ex-boyfriends (I used to be an actress so I dated a lot of "industry" people, i.e. playwrights and actors and ne'er-do-wells), such as positive reviews of their latest play. With not a comment. AND when she picked me up at the airport after I had returned from living in London for a year, she happened to drop the bomb that she had run into my ex's current GF, whose boobs were considerably bigger than mine and whom he now lived with (his unwillingness to move in ever was a sore point. And my boobs are small.). WTF? We will be better mothers if we are ever mothers, right?

  25. Atlantic City is both creepy and fascinating. But the real font of weirdness is Myrtle Beach. My sister and I passed through there on a spring whirlwind tour of the coastal South. It's like Redneck Vegas, down to the orange Ti-D-Bowl fountain pretending to be a volcano.Also, @Anne, "aren't you glad it's me telling you this…" can sometimes only be answered by, "well, no, mom, because if someone else said that to me I would deck them". My mom was the ultimate passive aggressive weight nag. She once sent me a care package of fattening treats with a little newspaper article about how being fat is unhealthy enclosed right atop the goodies. I had to do some severe boundary-retraining on her after that one.

  26. So, I love, love the idea of a Vegas conference! I think it sounds fabulous. All kinds of fabulous. (I say that, though this is my last year of funding in school, so I may be living in my parents' basement next year, begging them to buy me a stump pump!)Generally speaking, I do not really approve of gambling, or rather of casinos. (I totally approve of poker around the kitchen table.) But I am deeply, deeply curious about Vegas. And would absolutely be up for meeting you all. In the wedding dress that wasn't (and actually, that wasn't going to be–I was going to take it apart and re-make it out of silk. It was polyester, and $10 at a thrift store. We were going to use it to make a pattern, etc….)

  27. Boy, Santa can be SUCH a jerk sometimes! My mom used to comment on my weight and/or how said weight made my clothes fit all the time when I was younger, then finish the thought with "but aren't you glad it's me telling you this instead of someone else?" Uh no, Mom. Oh, and about those dresses – the one you wore isn't too far off from the kind of dress I'd actually pick for myself, should the time ever come. I can't stand this recent trend of horrible, strapless wedding gowns. Sometimes they do actually look nice, but EVERYONE is doing it! Rad's wedding was the only one I've gone to in the last decade where the bride had sleeves. Lace and bows need to make a comeback.Rad and I will have to figure out a time to wear our rockabilly dresses together. I so want to go to New York this fall (I've never been), and I think accepting the D-Med Challenge should help make it happen.Gosh, and thanks for checking out my blogging side project 🙂

  28. That's so awesome! I should wrangle my Winesday Women into something like this. Fab idea. My mom always went on how she was "so fat" when she got married…and then I wore her wedding dress when I got married, and it was so freakin' tight!! Enough to give me a complex.

  29. Love that navel bow too! Going to a conference in Vegas and am now thinking that the wedding-dressy Kimchi Blue thing I haven't had the nerve to wear out yet may have to come with me. And it'll just look like I'm in a hurry to say my vows if I need to run away from anyone….

  30. CoNsumption. Okay, I feel better now. Also, I am not opposed to Vegas excess though I suppose I should be. Vegas is what it is and I find it fascinating. Including the seedier sides, which are a particularly human tragedy, which I know I shouldn't be fascinated by but I can't help my rubbernecking. And to answer your question, Rad, I don't know if it is a Thing with Canadian academics. Vegas is a quick (and often cheap) flight from Vancouver so I noticed that it was a popular destination when I lived there, but it is a serious CHORE for me to get there from where I am (so much so that I am wondering what Atlantic City is like). But it seems to be a Thing with our jetset. A-Dubs Hubs has been there many, many times for bachelor parties though I know fewer women who make the trek. It is a seriously unpleasant flight experience from where I live on the east coast and my last experience made me re-think it.

  31. Vegas is very academic. Do you know that there is a 9/11 memorial at the New York, New York hotel? And that it was implemented permanently as a result of an impromptu outpouring of memorialization at the site of the hotel at the time? If that isn't a simulacrum, I don't know what is.A colleague of mine and A-Dubs works on 9/11 memorialization and visited Vegas as part of a research trip. She also visited the (now defunct) Star Trek experience at the Vegas Hilton, which I visited on her recommendation. I might have a photograph of myself in a command uniform superimposed next to Picard in a portrait of the TNG crew. Might.In short, Vegas is awesome. For fantasy and comsumption. What if we met there IRL …

  32. Woo – 'cannot wait for the photo-documentation from all others! (Even though no one's agreed to follow your directive, D-Med, I feel certain that they should as it's the appropriate and feminist thing to do.)Also, E-Jooooooooo! And finally, perhaps now's the time to begin organizing a fantasy style-blogger Vegas conference? We could plan it for, like, 18 months from now. And for those who are politically opposed to Vegas excess (which I'm assuming we all kind of are), we need to think of it as an important scholarly opportunity to inhabit the most overt version of the simulacrum/society of the spectacle!

  33. E-Jo, it is the great oversight of our lives that you were not our friend when this Vegas trip happened. You can remedy this by repeating the wedding dress experience with your sisters this month. Anne & Rad, your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to photo-document the similarly fab dress-wearing on the streets of NYC. I expect to see them on The Cohabitating Closet AND Anne's awesome new photo blog. Cynthia & A-Dubs, yeah Mums are both harsh and supportive. If only they knew. My mum/Santa always slips anti-wrinkle and anti-aging skin care treatments into my stocking, though she never speaks of them. Obviously, this enrages me. Ah Christmas!AftK, I fully endorse your wearing the wedding dress to Vegas. I think wedding dresses in Vegas are actually slightly more appropriate than they are at a wedding.

  34. THIS is the post that ends my days as a lurker.That first picture is one of the greatest pictures ever. Why, WHY, wasn't I friends with you dudes then?Also, to re-iterate, your mother totally doesn't know (neither does yours, A-Dubs).

  35. Rad: We should really work on that. Sometime after August, I'm guessing 🙂 If I really do make it to New York in the fall (which I really, really want to) we could tour the city in our similarly fab dresses.

  36. Yes, that is a nightgown. With a matching puffy-sleeved sheer robe. Without the robe – then – it was so slutty I would have looked like a Vegas cocktail waitress. In the context of today's super-short babydoll dresses, my ensemble looks positively demure. Also, D-Med, for the zillionth time, I like your mom, but your mom is wrong about you in this dress. You look slender in that dress and were, I think, possibly the classiest of the brides.Though she never says so directly, I'm certain my mother thinks I'm aging badly. I'm certain because she regularly gives me anti-wrinkle creams and anti-aging body lotions. Occasionally, she talks about under-eye bags/circles and genetics. I secretly have a complex about it, but am trying really hard to throw it off.

  37. I've never been to Vegas, but if I were to go this would be the way I'd want to do it.Moms are strange about bodies, aren't they? Like to give you a complex.

  38. Hmm… what does it say about me that I genuinely considered wearing dresses like each one of these? I've never been to Vegas, but I have other Canadian friends who've been, also academics. Is that a Thing(TM)? Rather than big as a house, I think you awesome. Feminine and traditional, but also pretty smokin'.That picture of A-Dubs is killing me.I once went to this very strange birthday dinner in graduate school and we all wore all black, because that was our cheapy way of looking sophisticated. A friend's brother was horrified and asked why we were in mourning.Anne is lying. We both have similar floral rockabilly dresses, but we haven't worn them at the same time, yet…

  39. Wow. Just wow.If I ever go to Vegas, I will know what to do with the wedding gown that I bought but never wore. Wow.A couple of friends and I had matching Halloween costumes for a while–we were the 3 witches from Macbeth. But otherwise, not so much. I think my sister and I have matching (or coordinating) saris, but we have never worn them at the same time.

  40. Wow, there is just so much awesome in this post. I've never been to Vegas, but if I did, I can only hope my friends and I would look this fab. It's pretty safe to say that none of my friends dress anything like me. The only time that comes to mind was my first Halloween in Chicago, when my best friend/roommate and I both dressed up as Catholic school girls. It wasn't too hard to do since we met at our Catholic high school, where we dressed alike everyday. Because we had to.

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